Stories such as the Duggars’ have brought large families into the public view and caused some people to wonder why some Christians have large families on purpose.  Everyone’s idea of “large” is a little different, and individual families might have slightly different (‘though likely overlapping) reasons.  But there are some biblical principles that provide us with good reasons to have families as large as God will give us.

The Dominion Mandate

Let’s start at the very beginning.  As God wrapped up His act of creation, He blessed Adam & Eve and told them to be fruitful & multiply, fill the earth, and subdue it.  This is often referred to, briefly, as the “Dominion Mandate.”

Adam and Eve, as representatives of the entire human race generally, and the people of God, specifically, were charged with filling and ruling the world as God’s regents.  A key element of carrying out this mandate is fruitfulness.

Right about now, you might be protesting that this was a corporate instruction, and every individual can’t be expected to carry it out.  That’s true…but if you focus on that you’ll miss an important point: the corporate body is comprised of individuals.

Every individual will not be placed in a position to fulfill this mandate in exactly the same way.  There is no shame in being infertile.  Married people are not more valuable or godly than single people.  Paul and Jesus were certainly not lesser!

But the way we think about this instruction — our attitude toward it — matters.

Fruitfulness is good and right, a fundamental part of God’s design.  And if everyone says, “well, I don’t have to; someone else will,” then no one will.  Our attitude should be one of eagerly seeking to participate in His work as fully as He will allow us to, not of latching onto any excuse we can find to get out of it.

God, the Opener of the Womb

We learn from Scripture that it is God’s divine prerogative to open and close the womb.  We don’t see this very overtly in many places, but the principle does show up in the stories of Jacob’s wives.

“When the Lord saw that Leah was unloved, He opened her womb…” (Gen. 29:31)  When Rachel saw this, she envied her sister, and demanded that Jacob, her husband, give her children.  His response?  “Am I in the place of God, who has withheld from you the fruit of the womb?” (Gen. 30:1-2)

“Am I in the place of God?”

He is the giver of children.  Sometimes, for reasons we don’t always (or even usually!) understand, He is also the withholder of children.  He is the One who makes alive (Deut. 32:39)…or not.

But do we trust Him?  Do we trust that He is good and wise and working all things together for our good?  (Rom. 8:28)  Do we seek Him when we don’t understand His decisions or when we want something more/different?

Or do we attempt to take this power for ourselves, forcing the womb open or closed as we see fit, in man’s power as Rachel demanded?

Children Are a Blessing

Children are not merely an obligation, though; children are a blessing.

“Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,
The fruit of the womb is a reward.
Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
So are the children of one’s youth.
Happy [or “blessed”] is the man who has his quiver full of them;
They shall not be ashamed,
But shall speak with their enemies in the gate.” (Ps. 127:3-5)

Fruitful wombs are listed right alongside other blessings of the covenant in Deuteronomy 28, as well — like abundant crops and success in battle.

As a rule, people seek out blessings.  We’re happy to have more money, a better job, a bigger house or yard…

If we really believe that children, too, are a blessing, not a burden, ought we not be just as delighted to be blessed with more children?  “Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them.”

Children Are an Investment

Many struggle to see children as a blessing rather than a burden because children are costly — not only financially, but in terms of our time and attention.

What they miss is that children are an investment.  Like any other investment, there is an up-front cost, but this produces a benefit over time.  More than that, they are what this permaculturalist describes as a regenerative investment: an investment that “actually gets better” over time.  You ultimately get more out of a regenerative investment than what you put in.

Children are a primary way we build the Kingdom.  Children raised up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord are soldiers in the Lord’s Army… workers in His harvest field…our weapons for the future.

As in the parable of the talents, not all of us have identical opportunities to serve the Lord in this way.  But whatever opportunity is entrusted to us, we’re expected to use, not to bury it because investing is too much work or too much risk.

It’s a joyous opportunity and honor to multiply and sharpen up arrows.  To train up Kingdom soldiers.  To prepare workers to gather in the Lord’s harvest.  Nothing the world has to offer is worth trading that for.

But What About…?

I can hear the objections.  But what about the single woman?  What about the mom who only has one child?  How many children are “enough”?

It’s not about the numbers.  There’s no “right number” of children.  One doesn’t gain “godliness points” with each consecutive child.  The exact size of one’s family is not the point.

What’s important is having a willing heart, joyfully submitted the Lord.  Calling good what He calls good.  Valuing what He values.  What He does with that will vary from family to family, just as it did with the families we see in Scripture.